Facing my fear of kayaking – and not letting it hold me back from achieving my dreams

I’ve always been a little trepidatious when it came to kayaking.

Ever since high school when kayaking in the school swimming pool was a component of PE. Physical education, for a geeky teenager who could barely throw a ball to save herself, wasn’t great at the best of times, but the kayaking class was something else.

There I was sat in a kayak, locked in by the spray deck that covered me from the waist down, learning how to capsize and roll the kayak back up.

It didn’t go very well. Continue reading

This is what it’s like to live with self-doubt

I don’t need a bully. That nasty someone to belittle me, call me names, tell me I’m no good, that I’m stupid and ugly. Nope, I don’t need a bully – and yet I’m bullied every day.

That’s because I’m my own bully; I’m my own worst enemy.

Since my school days, I’ve barraged myself with negativity, put downs and self-doubt – you’re so uncool, you’re boring, you’re stupid, you’re not attractive, I would tell myself. I’d question what I thought and what I did. I’d tell myself other people were better than me, that I should be more like them, but that I could never be because I wasn’t good enough. Continue reading

Age is no excuse if you’re up for the challenge

Are you too old to set out on your dreams? Forge a new path? Take on a physically demanding challenge?

According to society’s standards I technically have passed my peak (I cry tears into my wine glass while examining the grey hairs sprouting from my temples). Even my mother recently told me I was classed as old now. (Thanks mum!) Continue reading

How to conquer self-doubt: Remove toxic people from your life

Almost everyone has them – you know, those “friends” who are always quick to find something wrong with an idea or err on the side of negativity; those ones that deflate your happiness like popping a balloon and leave you feeling down and depressed and wrung out after spending even five minutes with them.

These are bad people and we do not need them in our lives. Continue reading

Why having patience when achieving your goals is important

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Last week I blogged about my goals for 2017 – 15 things I essentially needed to do (or not do, in the case of watching TV) this year to upskill, up my personal development and help progress my #40by40 quest. There were a couple of things I didn’t include on the list, such as investigate mindfulness and practice patience.

I am, by far, one of the most impatient people ever – maybe it goes back to the fact that when I was born I was two weeks overdue and then my poor mother spent around 48 hours in labour, so perhaps I feel I’ve got some catching up to do! Continue reading

How to conquer self-doubt: Review your progress

Earlier this week I blogged about imposter syndrome (where you believe you’re a fraud and fear being discovered as such) and how it exists to make you doubt yourself and think you’re not worthy of success or achieving your dreams.

Part of what drives the syndrome is the thinking that any success is a result of luck and not hard work, ability or determination. Continue reading

Do you have imposter syndrome?

So it transpires that I have a condition called imposter syndrome.

No I’m not pretending to be a superhero who wears their underpants on the outside. And I’m definitely not an undercover spy, and I can’t claim to be royalty.

Nope, imposter syndrome, as it turns out, is a condition where the sufferer feels like a fraud and doesn’t believe they deserve their success, and fears they will be “found out” by their peers and bosses. Continue reading

How to conquer self-doubt: Stop making excuses

I have become quite adept at making excuses as to why I can’t do things:

“I can’t go to the gym because I’m too tired.”

“I don’t want to go out after work because it’s too cold or I haven’t got anything nice to wear.”

“I can’t climb that mountain because I’m not fit enough and don’t have the right skills.”

“I can’t go travelling because I have family commitments.”

“I can’t start researching my 40 volcanoes because I’m too busy.”

“I can’t achieve this goal because it’s too expensive.”

“I can’t be successful because I’m not good enough and don’t deserve it.”

From one point of view these might seem like logical reasons but at the end of the day they are all just big, fat, ugly excuses. And excuses, I have learnt, get in the way of doing things, of achieving goals, of making changes to your life. They stop dreams in their tracks, they keep you stuck in a rut, and stuck in a comfort zone.  They make you chose the easy option, the safe option, the boring option.

Excuses are evil and bad. Continue reading

This is what I have learnt about time

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Everyone has busy lives and responsibilities and commitments – that’s just the way life is.

But being busy is often used as an excuse as to why goals and dreams can’t be started or achieved – you know the one: ‘I can’t start such and such because I’ve got A, B and C to do and they take up too much time. Ahhhh there’s not enough hours in the day!’

The thing is, I have learnt that this is a fallacy. Sure there are only so many hours in the day and you reasonably have to sleep, eat and work but everyone has the same amount of time, so what’s the catch that some people seem to have more success at being successful with their goals and dreams?

Continue reading